At what point does thinking become too much?
is it when the thoughts take you away from the present moment?
Maybe it’s when a thought jams its curious finger in an old wound and now we are left to either feel that pain or scramble to numb it.
It feels as if I try to balance myself between thinking and jumping onto an abyss of thoughts.
especially, right now.
In this quarantine life
I have felt as if I have had too much time to reflect and no where to hide from it.
My inner volume has been turned up to max
I have to listen.
Sometimes all I can do
uncertainty about what I want to do and who I want to become has manage to get louder
who I am now and how far I have came, has too.
I have been frustrated and joyful
loving and sad
angry and blissful
desolated and grateful
about everything and nothing.
Lately I have gone down these rabbit holes of thought and came out the other side
a little different each time.
we have been given more time to be still and think
Sometimes this has felt like a curse.
and in others,
it has helped me maneuver through this unknown experience of being safer at home
a l l t h e
f u c k i n g
t i m e.